I’ve had to face rejection so many times, I’ve lost count.

I’ve watched people attending my talks cross their arms, and roll their eyes at me. 

I even recently met someone I believed was a potential student tell me they wished their previous teacher would teach the class I’m teaching – they just loved him so much, and did I know how he was doing? Did I know if he’d be back?

And I used to respond to these situations by trying to become a little different – more like a person who those people wouldn’t reject.

But that was exhausting! When we try to make people who have rejected us accept us, we can’t be authentic. When we aren’t authentic, we aren’t wholly tapped into our Divinity, which means we aren’t tapped into the inspiration and joy that comes with our authenticity.

I had to learn to see rejection as a de-selection process, so I could re-direct my efforts.

De-selection – in that I don’t want to pour energy into situations where my gifts aren’t received and welcomed. When I’m rejected it draws a clear boundary for me to honor.

Re-direction – then I can turn away from that situation and move toward where I belong.

Recently I again faced rejection with someone in my community life who doesn’t appreciate my music. My first reaction was to find a song he’d like, so I could be accepted and enfolded into his community.

But then I remembered that for me, rejection triggers obsession – and I knew my authentic self didn’t want anything to do with his project.

I first honored that it doesn’t feel great to be rejected, but reminded myself if I tried to force it, I’d be miserable, and stuck having to constantly seek his approval.

With that choice, he passed through my de-selection process – I won’t try again to “belong” to his project because I was instead re-directed toward those things that inspire me and bring me joy.

True – rejection feels lousy. But when we can honor that, we can see it as the force that de-selects from our lives those situations that would make us suffer. That then gives us the freedom to move toward our place of true belonging.

XOXO Deanna

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“Thank You Universe for the good that’s on ITS way!”

One of the most powerful tenants of the New Thought metaphysics philosophy is the importance of having faith that our good is on its way, even when the appearance of that good is absent from our physical life.

Sometimes it can be hard to believe that something good is on its way, especially if we are experiencing something really difficult.

If we are in pain, it can be hard to imagine that wholeness is already ours.

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Back in 2007, I asked the angels for a “sign;” Should we move or should we stay?
 
Well, actually I wanted to move. I was stressed, and our house needed so much work, and the bathroom had this mold in it :::yuck:::. And then my husband mentioned that he’d seen a house for rent that “looked like an enchanted cottage.” Of course I HAD to go look at it. And of course I took my kids who were 10 and 8 at the time. We fell in love with it.
 
So I found myself in a quandary; should we move or not?
 
I wanted to move because I wanted to run away from the stress that was in my life at that time.
 
So I asked the angels “should we move or stay?” And I decided that if I saw a “444” anywhere, it meant that we should move. So I got in my car, and I drove around town, staring down every license plate, until FINALLY I spotted my “444.” My sign!!!
 
It was time to sell our home of seven years and move – the angels told me so.

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The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don’t go back to sleep.

You must ask for what you really want.
Don’t go back to sleep.

People are going back and forth across the doorsill
where the two worlds touch.

The door is round and open.
Don’t go back to sleep.

Rumi

I spent a good part of my adult life waiting; waiting for support, guidance, improvements, help, or relief. I’ve waited for my husband to read my mind, my kids to do chores I haven’t asked them to do, and my friends to call me out of the blue. I’ve waited for my sister to help me with the burden of caregiving to my mom. I’ve waited to be invited to sing, speak, and teach. I’ve waited to be appreciated, recognized, and acknowledged.

I’ve done a lot of waiting.

And I used to believe this was the way things were done.

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“When you undervalue what you do, the world will undervalue who you are.” ~ Oprah Winfrey

Often when we think about manifesting the good in our life, that includes getting to live our “calling,” and being appreciated for the work we do, and the gifts we share.

However, we may find ourselves facing a great deal of resistance when trying to share our gifts and talents! It just may seem as if no one could give a flying fig about what we have to offer!

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“Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.” ~ Brené Brown

I used to have a really hard time accepting myself. I thought my gifts and talents were just wishful thinking, and I was embarrassed to actually own up to those things I was just naturally good at for fear someone would see me for the miserable failure that I was. I never felt authentic because I was constantly trying to be better, and more acceptable.

That may sound harsh, but it was how I felt, once upon a time.

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“God gives some more than others because some accept more than others.” ~ Ernest Holmes

Oh boy! This used to be a really hard one for me to understand, because I thought being a good person, being a “spiritual” person, meant waiting for the Universe to just give me what I needed (or wanted). A good person doesn’t ask for things, right? Because that would be selfish.

Meanwhile, I’d see people around me accomplishing what I SOOOO wanted to accomplish! I couldn’t understand why the Universe would give to them, and not to me.

Why would It make things happen for one person, and not another?

Then one day my husband and I took our kids to this restaurant that is just a giant smorgasbord (you pick out your own food – as much as you want, whatever you want).

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From the moment I taught my first class on metaphysics, I was determined to help anyone who crossed my path. Even if it meant cornering them at a dinner party, I was going to be of service, and cause transformation, whether they wanted it or not.

Then one day, as I had my next victim, I mean student, lined up in my sights, I noticed that she kept backing away from me, even as I kept stepping forward into her space, giving her my unsolicited, yet life-changing advice. I saw her eyes darting around trying to catch the attention of absolutely anyone who might rescue her from me, when I realized that I’d become that new age know-it-all that everyone avoided; I was the Fixer.

The Fixer is determined to be of service because they themselves need appreciation and accolades. The Fixer is not as far along on their spiritual path as they’d like everyone to believe, and helping others, and getting to feel good about it, make up for the good feelings that genuine transformation would bring. 

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“I am only one, but I am still one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something. And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.” ~ Helen Keller

There has been a lot of tragedy in our world. Every week there is sad news, heartache, and loss. And we feel these reverberations. We think about the Sundays we’ve spent sitting in church, or gone to movie theaters, concerts, or other special outdoor events. And we are almost at the point where if we didn’t personally know someone who died in a shooting, we know someone who does.

But recently I overheard someone saying that our world has gone to shit. And though at a glance it may seem that way, I have to disagree. I think there is a symptom that needs to be addressed, and highly conscious souls are being called forth to shine through these dark times.

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Lugh was a Celtic god of many talents. He journeyed to Tara, where Nuada was king, and asked to become part of the court. However, the doorkeeper told Lugh that only a craftsman, someone with a special gift to offer the court, would be admitted.

Lugh told him that he was a skilled blacksmith. But they already had a blacksmith.

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